The Echoes of her Soul
In the summer of 2017, I was on what would be my last military deployment, busy non-stop as the lead joint terminal attack controller for the Special Operations Task Force in Afghanistan—hunting ISIS and the Taliban with airstrikes and running a team of operators attached to Special Forces teams dispersed throughout the country. It was my last deployment before retirement from a twenty-year military career, and for nineteen of those years, my loving and amazing wife was right alongside me. Her birthday was coming up, and our nineteen-year anniversary soon after. I had to do something special. So I spent what precious wakeful moments of available time I had—for the better part of a month—writing and perfecting this poem.
To me, this poem relays the essence of her, of our life together, of the family we created, and of the struggles we’ve endured together. I rarely write poetry (and maybe you’ll deduce that as you read), but at least I can say that my heart was poured into this poem. I suppose that’s all that counts. Still, of all the things I’ve written—this was probably the most pure….
The Echoes of Her Soul
The beach’s wind rasps against white cotton
The delicate fabric of her bathing suite cover flutters
As she walks barefoot through powder white sand
Her long soft hair stays gently yielding
Ever thoughtful to her skin despite the harshness of the gusts along the shore
In a way, her hair’s resilience casts echoes of her soul
When, even bound in hardship, remains kind
Across the ocean echoes ring
They resonate within me
And I can feel her soul
I feel it in the memory of a sidelong glance
And an adorable half-smile of tender pursed lips
I feel it in the memory of a playful wink
From eyes of shining sweetness such that only love can form
I feel it in the memory of a touch so warm with love it always halts me
And I am overcome with awe in the beauty of her being
Two hundred moons have shined upon us
Cool light welcomed in the calm embrace of night
And as the sun and moon will push and pull, drift near and far
Yet remain in constant bond
So too has our love through countless battles conquered
And boldly raised a flag of victory for all the world to see
We cannot know, when we start this life, where our paths will take us
History remembers but man forgets the tortured fates of some
Who through ages past endured, had never known such joy
And, for others, clutched from the warmth of ordinary life, by war or other torment
Such that love was never known
Two moons
Our angels came to us
And on those days she said to me,
‘Those were special moons! Did you see?’
I can’t remember
But I remember other things
I remember standing speechless
As first breaths filled their chests
A quite witness to all life’s vigor, cherished in one moment
I remember standing breathless
As tiny eyes struggled open
Pure sublime and innocence, illuminated by life’s first light
I remember my heart aching joy
As soft cries sang throughout the room
Delicate and seeking, in search of mommy’s warmth and love
She leapt
Into an unknown sea
Fearless and undaunted
From then a special beauty rose, as motherhood became her
And as the blossom of a Lotus flower greets the morning sun
And brilliant pedals slowly yawn to catch each ray of light
Abounding mother’s love, within her, took my love and changed it
To grow a thousand-fold and pale the love I’d had before
If a god should come to me one day, with boasts of power infinite
To somehow hold me chosen, ME
Above the rest of man
And grant my life its greatest wish
I’d tell the god he’d come too late, there’s nothing more I need
Then quietly turn away
To feel
The echoes of her soul
